Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Hoping for something out of nothing...

"Gusto mo bang pagusapan? Gusto mong mag-isa? 
Alam ko kung anong nararamdaman mo. 
Masakit, kahit alam mong wala kang karapatan masaktan.
Pero nararamdaman mo nagkakaunawaan kayo, pero di nyo pa napaguusapan.
May nararamdaman ka sa kanya. At sa iyo, sapat na yun para ituring mo na sa iyo siya.
Mahirap yung mahal na mahal mo ang isang tao, na sa puso't isip inangkin mo na siya.
Tapos hindi naman pala para sa iyo.
Masakit, pero wala kang magagawa."
- Bert to Cristina(Bobby Andrews to Regine Velasquez) from the movie Pangako ikaw Lang

This kind of love is the classic I-know-that-you-know-that-I-like-you-but-we-just-have-not-talked-about-it-yet.

And this SUCKS! BIG TIME!

And what's worse, is that you cannot talk about it. You cannot even react. You cannot even cry in front of the person. You cannot even get angry to that person. Because YOU DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT.


Yes! You don't even have the right to say that you LOVE that person.

You cannot even admit to yourself that after just a short span of time, that you've fallen in love with that person.

And you know what's the WORST?... Is that YOU CANNOT EVEN WALK AWAY FROM THAT PERSON. You Cannot erase that person in your life. You cannot even delete that person's number on your mobile phone. You cannot hide from that person. Because you don't want to stir suspicions from other people that you are hurting and you don't have any option but to suck it up and deal with it. You don't want other people to know about what is happening, because you are so afraid of the awkward silences, piercing stares, rumors, gossip mongers and snide comments. You cannot live with that because you know that you still have unfinished business to do around him, and YOU JUST DON'T HAVE THE CHOICE TO VANISH FROM THAT PERSON'S LIFE COMPLETELY.



And the MOST AWFUL feeling, is that you cannot run away. You cannot even tell that person that you are hurting even though that person has an inkling feeling that there is something wrong.

The only time you'll get stronger is when there is no other choice but to be strong. =(

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